Wednesday, January 04, 2012

river runs through it.. or not.

The last post was post number 888. I began this blog over five years ago. I used to blog alot, often and about lots of different things. I don't really any more. One reason is facebook. You get more interaction on that social media place.. but shouldn't blogging be for you? A place for you to vent, to share, to bitch, to whatever? Should we worry who may come and read our blogs? Should we even care?

My head hurts, not literally, but is aching with stuff. Worry, heartache, mixed in with happiness... Remember that molasses river I mentioned in a previous post? Still running slow as ever. I have quit asking because if I don't ask, then I can't be disappointed with the answer, right? Yup, that's how I see it.

I am also frustrated, especially today. Do you ever scratch your head and ask yourself, Why? Or better yet, just a big, heavy, HUH.

Life isn't fair. Didn't your parents tell you that many times when you were growing up? And didn't you always think to yourself, boy, my folks say that all the time. And now that we are full fledged grown ups, we know it to be oh so true. I would say for the most part, I am an optimistic, happy person. I have difficulty, however, with things that don't sit right with me. Life, in the big scheme of things, is NOT fair. But as parents, shouldn't we try to make it an "equality" in our home? Sure, there will be exceptions.... for age, gender, maturity level, proven track records... My struggle is that I still must be careful.... those damn eggshells are still underneath my feet. It's getting really fricking old to have to worry about cracking them.... sometimes in life, shit happens. Yes, I said it. Shit happens. One thing my Dad always taught us growing up is something that I say often to my own kids, to other family/friends. Are you ready?

Feelings aren't right or wrong. They just are.


You cannot control how you feel.... whether it's sad, happy, disappointed, frustrated, pissed off, irritated, annoyed, nervous, worried, anxious... it's what or how you react or respond to those feelings that you CAN control. YOU control it. Maybe you don't agree with something but it's how you choose to share that with someone can completely make or break a mood. For example, most of us decorate for the holidays. But what if you live with someone who for the most part could care less whether there is anything more than a simple tree up? You actually enjoy looking through the holiday stuff and unpacking and then repacking, knowing that next year, it will be like a new treasure to unwrap and think back to the previous year.. you tell yourself, Oh, remember last year... The other person is entitled to not like to do that or even participate in the unpacking or repacking... but how they react (say complaining most of the day while you are trying to enjoy and savor the holiday moment) can have a significant impact on your mood. The other's feelings aren't right or wrong, they just are. But the choice of verbalizing them to someone who enjoys something, can be a damper.

Anyway, I have always told my kids that hate is too strong of a word and should be only used when absolutely necessary. I am beginning to hate a situation. (Who am I kidding?! I have disliked it for some time.) It's the molasses river.

And it's sticky stuff.

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